


If I Loved You

by RegalStarlight



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, oq week, warning: brief reference to marital rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-21
Updated: 2015-10-03
Packaged: 2018-04-07 06:12:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4252392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RegalStarlight/pseuds/RegalStarlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just after her wedding, Regina ran away from her arranged marriage and found herself living among outlaws in Sherwood Forest.  Still in pain over Daniel’s death, she refuses to let herself love again, but soon her feelings for Robin become too strong to ignore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fake Relationship

“I know you’re not really in love with me.”

Regina smiled, resting her head on Robin’s shoulder as he spoke. She ignored the tiny flutter of excitement in her stomach.

“Right,” she said. “Of course not.”

“But if you were …”

“Then what?” she asked, looking up at him out of the corner of her eye.

His eyes twinkled as he let out a laugh. She smiled in spite of herself. But his arm wrapped around her reminded her too much of another pair of arms that would never hold her again, and her happiness faded as quickly as if she had been doused with ice water.

It had been like this for months, ever since the runaway Queen had stumbled blindly into the outlaw’s path, having turned down the chance to learn magic and fled the castle the morning after her wedding.

“I will protect you,” he had promised when she told him her story.

And with the King’s soldiers hunting for her, the best way to do that was to take on a new identity. Gone was Queen Regina, and in her place was Regina of Locksley, a simple peasant woman who lived among the outlaws in Sherwood Forest. With her ragged clothes and uncombed hair, no one who saw her would ever mistake her for royalty, even if it was true. Her so-called “romance” with Robin was just the final layer of the illusion, the reason his men believed she was there. She knew he had feelings for her, but he had never tried to push her into making their fake relationship real.

“You lost your True Love,” he had said. “That’s not an easy burden to bear. I hope someday you do heal from that and find love again, but if it’s not with me … I just want you to be happy.”

Maybe that was it. Maybe that was why she felt so safe in his arms, why she found her thoughts lingering on him. It wasn’t love she felt, because her heart would always be with Daniel, but he was a friend, someone she could trust, someone who – though she couldn’t make herself admit it – she couldn’t imagine her life without. He was an anchor in her storm, a fire on a cold night, a light in her darkness.

But she wasn’t in love with him.

He traced her jaw gently with his fingertips, tilting her chin up so that she was looking him in the eyes.

“But if you were, I would be the luckiest man in the world.”

Regina’s heart fluttered. His eyes were so soft and blue, and she was reminded vaguely of another pair of eyes that had looked at her in almost just the same way, gentle and protective and full of awe, as if he couldn’t believe she was right there in his arms loving him back.

Except that she wasn’t. She wasn’t in love.

“If I loved you …”

What would she be? Surely not the luckiest girl in the world. That sort of thing wasn’t possible for her anymore. Not from the moment that Daniel had collapsed onto the floor of the stables, his heart crushed into ash. But she couldn’t deny, if she hadn’t loved and lost Daniel, if she was just here in Robin’s arms loving him, really loving him …

“If I loved you, it would be like a beautiful dream,” she finally said. “It _is_ a beautiful dream. But it’s not … it can’t be real.”

He nodded, a smile on his lips that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“I understand.”

But as he squeezed her hand comfortingly and stood, leaving her side to gather firewood or speak to some of his men or whatever it was he was doing, Regina couldn’t help but miss the feeling of his arms around her. She couldn’t help but wish for the dream to be real, even though she had made enough wishes as a child to know how futile they were. She couldn’t help imagining the taste of his lips and the feeling of waking up in his arms, safe and warm and loved more than she had imagined she could be ever again.

Maybe not today. But someday …

No. She wasn’t in love. She couldn’t be.


	2. Teach Me

Regina had been with the Merry Men for three months now, and those months had changed her in ways she had never expected. The fragile young queen was long gone, and in her place was a creature of the forest. Her muscles had grown strong and toned from the hard work of living as a commoner, and she dressed more like a man than a woman, in trousers and ragged blouses. She never in her wildest dreams would have imagined herself sitting around a campfire with a gang of thieves, eating stew made from the meat of animals she had helped to hunt, listening to them discussing their plans for their next robbery. And yet here she was.

“I want you to take me with you this time,” she said, cutting into their conversation about carriages on the King’s Road. “Let me help.”

All eyes were on her. Alan a Dale scowled and grudgingly handed over a bag full of gold to Little John, who winked at Regina and thanked her for helping him win their bet. Robin looked at her with big, concerned eyes.

“Regina, you don’t know the first thing about robbing carriages,” he said.

“Fine,” she replied. “Then teach me.”

“Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked. “It’s your decision, but you should know that it’s incredibly dangerous. There’s always the risk of getting caught, and if they do catch you …”

She nodded, understanding his meaning. The others would simply think he was warning her about the threat of being hanged, but she knew there was more to his words than that. As King Leopold’s fugitive bride, who knew what would become of her if she was caught? Somehow she doubted that the king would welcome her back as his wife, not that she would want that. She had decided months ago that staying in that prison of a castle was a fate worse than any dangers the woods held. But that didn’t matter. The Merry Men were her family now, and she wanted to be one of them in every way possible.

“I’m sure,” she said.

“Well, then,” said Robin. “I guess we’re going to teach you to be a proper thief.”

* * *

 

The robbery went off without a hitch. Regina waited at the side of the road, her arm wrapped in bandages soaked in the blood of a bird Robin shot down that morning, playing the part of a damsel in distress while Robin ran up to the carriage shouting for help.

“My wife and I were attacked on the road,” he told the driver as the carriage slowed to a halt. “She’s badly injured. I would be greatly indebted to you if you helped us.”

The man leapt down from his seat and rushed to Regina’s side, gasping at the ugly mess that her arm seemed to be. But his compassion would only cost him, because as soon as his attention was on Robin and Regina instead of the carriage, three of the Merry Men crept up behind it to relieve it of its treasures. Regina’s job was to keep him distracted long enough to let them get away.

“You poor girl,” the carriage driver said, approaching her. “The bandits in these woods are terrible, I’ve heard. It looks like you’ve been hurt badly.”

Regina faked a wince of pain as he reached for her arm.

“Hold still, dear. I served in the army when I was a much younger man, and I’ve seen many an injury. I know how to treat wounds like this. Those bandages are far too loose, but I can fix them. I just need you to let me look at it so I can see how badly injured you are.”

She nodded shakily, still playing the terrified girl as he unwound the bandages. Secretly, she was studying his face, waiting for the moment when he realized he’d been tricked. There it was. His eyes widened as bandages fell away to reveal an uninjured arm.

“I don’t understand …” the man shook his head. “All that blood, and you don’t seem to be hurt at all.

Regina smiled and exchanged a glance with Robin.

“That’s because I’m not,” she said. And with that, she swung her supposedly injured arm and punched him in the face. There was an ugly sound of something cracking, and blood gushed from his nose as her fist made contact. She must have broken it. But there was no time to think about that now, as she and Robin took off into the forest, leaving the unfortunate carriage driver clutching his face in the middle of the road.

Later, as the men sat around the fire counting their loot, they laughed and called him a fool for mistaking their fierce little bandit woman for a damsel in distress. Never had a robbery gone off more smoothly, they told her. She was a natural, it seemed.

* * *

 

Later, she found Robin in his tent, running his hands through a pile of gold coins and letting them slip through his fingers like large grains of sand. The look on his face was pensive.

“Is everything okay?” she asked.

He shrugged his shoulders and looked from the gold to her face and back again.

“Do you ever feel guilty?” he asked quietly. “Living like we do, off of stolen money?”

She laughed and shook her head. “That money came from one of the King’s carriages. Trust me, he has more than enough already. You’re not doing any harm by making sure it never reaches him.”

He nodded, but she could tell he was still lost in his thoughts.

“Don’t tell me the infamous Robin of Locksley has a conscience after all,” she quipped.

“Does that surprise you so much?” he asked.

_Of course not,_ she thought. She had seen enough of the infamous thief to know he wasn’t just greedy and cruel. He might not be a storybook hero, but he was a good person.

“I’ve seen what evil looks like,” said Regina. “And you’re not it. But if you want a piece of advice …”

“Yes?”

“You have this money now. It’s your decision how you spend it.”

His eyes lit up, and a smile spread across his face.

“Come with me,” he said, jumping to his feet and stuffing several handfuls of gold coins into his pockets. “I have a brilliant idea.”

* * *

 

They walked side-by-side through the poorest part of town, their pockets overflowing with stolen money. It didn’t take much time at all before a frail woman dressed in threadbare rags and holding a baby to her chest approached them timidly.

“Alms for the poor?”

Robin smiled and offered her a handful of gold coins. Her eyes went wide, and she protested that it was too much, and surely the lovely young couple wasn’t wealthy, surely they couldn’t spare this much and still feed themselves. But Robin just shook his head and pushed the money back into her hands.

“You need it more than we do,” he said. “Trust me on that.”

A little ways down the road they found a little boy who timidly held out a ragged, dirty hat and begged for spare change. Tears stung at Regina’s eyes as she realized he probably didn’t have a home or a family, being out in the streets like this. But she blinked them back and dropped a handful of coins into his hat, watching his face light up.

“Go buy yourself something to eat,” she said, patting him on the head.

Before long, word must have gotten out that there were two strangers handing out money as if it grew on trees, because the streets filled with people, dressed in rags and desperate for anything that would allow them to eat that night, stretching their hands out and begging. Robin and Regina did their best to give something to everybody, but eventually, what they had brought with them dwindled until there was none left. As they walked away, a little girl, no more than eleven or twelve years old, came running up to them, tears in her eyes.

“Please, can you help me?” she asked. “My mother is sick, and we can’t afford to pay for medicine. I’m afraid she’s going to die.”

Robin and Regina exchanged a look.

“How much does the medicine cost?” Regina asked. The child told her, and it was expensive, but it would hardly make a dent in the gold they had stolen from the King’s carriage.

“Of course we’ll help,” Robin announced. Raising his voice to address the whole crowd, he continued: “And we’ll keep helping as much as we can, for all of you. For all those in this kingdom who struggle to survive while the privileged few live in luxury. I promise.”

A cheer rose up in the crowd, hailing them as the heroes of the people.

* * *

 

“Do you think the Merry Men will be okay with this?” Regina asked as they made their way back to the camp in the woods.

“Well, they’ll have to be,” said Robin. “Or if they’re not, we’ll leave and start our own band of thieves. No, not thieves, because we won’t be stealing for ourselves. This is what we’re meant to be doing, I can feel it.”

They smiled at each other, and Robin gave a little chuckle.

“What?” Regina demanded.

“Well, it’s a bit ironic, isn’t it?” he asked. “I thought I was teaching you to be a thief, but you … you taught me something much more important. How to be an honorable man.”


	3. Late Night Confessions

It took a week for the gold to run out. Ordinarily, it would take much longer, but they weren’t spending it on themselves this time, and despite King Leopold’s claims that his kingdom was happy and prosperous, there were countless people living in poverty, especially in the smaller outlying villages. Soon, it would be time to move to a new area, rob another carriage or castle and start again.

But for now, everything was quiet. Night had settled on the Merry Men’s camp, and the only sounds to be heard were the chirping of crickets and the faint snores of a few of the sleeping men. By the fire, Robin and Regina sat, staring up at the night sky.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” Robin asked, smiling at the woman who sat beside him.

“What’s beautiful?” Regina asked, turning to look at him and raising an eyebrow.

“The stars.”

She smiled and nodded, looking from his face back to the sky. He was right; the stars were beautiful, scattered out like little diamonds on the sky.

“You know, I never thought I’d meet a royal who could see the beauty in nature.”

His voice was hardly a whisper, but she flinched and looked around fearfully. If anyone heard what he said … but the other men were already sleeping, and there was no one else there to hear.

“I’m not a royal,” she sighed. “I left that life behind … I never wanted it to begin with.”

He nodded and wrapped his arm around her. She felt herself relax instinctively in his embrace.

“I know,” he said. “And someday, you’ll be able to stop fearing it. You’re safe here.”

They sat in silence for a while, listening to the crackling of the fire that cast shadows over their faces.

“You really believe that?” she finally asked.

He nodded and squeezed her hand.

“The past is the past, Regina,” he said. “I know you’re still in pain from it, but sooner or later, you will be able to move on. You can start a new life, one where you don’t have to be anyone you don’t want to be.”

“That’s what we always dreamed of,” Regina said pensively. “Me and Daniel. We were going to run away and start a new life somewhere my mother could never find us, but …”

“But you lost him,” Robin finished. “I’m truly sorry, Regina. I can’t even imagine the pain you must have felt.”

She looked at him with soft, questioning eyes. “You’ve never been in love?”

He looked away and made no reply.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I shouldn’t have asked it that way. Have you lost someone, too?”

He shook his head. “It’s not like that.”

“Then what?” she demanded, her voice rising in pitch. “Please, tell me. I want to understand.”

He turned back toward Regina and looked her in the eye.

“Isn’t it obvious?” he asked. “I’m in love with you, Regina.”

Oh. She felt tears welling up in her eyes at his words, but she blinked them away. How cruel of fate to play such a trick. He was in love with her, she was in love with a ghost, and none of them had the happiness they deserved. What could the three of them have possibly done for fate to treat them so cruelly?

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“For what?” he asked, a bemused expression on his face.

“You deserve better than a broken woman like me.”

As she spoke, a single tear trickled down her cheek.

“Regina …”

She shook her head. Whatever he had to say, she doubted it could make this any better.

“You know I don’t blame you, right?” he asked. “Even if you weren’t still mourning your True Love, you have the right to choose who you want to be with. It’s not me. I understand that. But I can’t help how I feel.”

“No, that’s what I’m trying to say,” Regina said, shaking her head. “When Daniel died, I told myself I would never love again. I didn’t _want_ to ever love again once I’d lost him. But then I met you.”

She watched his face carefully, but all she could see was confusion and maybe a little bit of hope. He wanted to believe it was still possible for them to be happy together. She knew better.

“I see so much of him in you,” she continued. “You’re not the same at all, but you’re both … you’re the only people in my life who have ever treated me like a person and not a possession. You’re kind to me just because you care. You listen to me and try to understand. You don’t want me to be anyone but myself. And I …” she choked up and was silent for a moment. “I’ve never had that before, except with Daniel.”

“And you lost him,” he said.

“Exactly. How can I even think of putting someone else at risk … but then again, I’m already doing that, just by being here.”

“Don’t worry about that,” he told her. “I’d gladly risk my life to protect you, Regina.”

“And I wish you didn’t have to. I can’t stand the thought of losing you, Robin.”

He didn’t reply.

Could she say it?

But how could she not?

“I love you.”

His eyes widened, and he blinked slowly, trying to process her words.

“I can’t keep pretending anymore. I can’t keep saying ‘if I loved you’ …” she said. “I do love you. And I only wish that it was enough.”

He squeezed her hand again. “Why isn’t it?”

“Because of Daniel. I said I’d love him for the rest of my life. How can I possibly just move on with someone else?”

Robin’s eyes softened.

“Just because you love me, it doesn’t mean you love him any less,” he said. “I’m sure you always will. But Daniel … from what you’ve told me of him, he would have wanted you to love again. He would have wanted you to be happy.”

Regina nodded hesitantly. “Yes, I think he would have.”

“So …”

She looked at him for a moment, taking in his kind blue eyes and the gentleness of his touch. Then she shook her head and pulled away.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “Maybe … maybe someday. But I’m not ready for this, not yet.”


	4. Childhood Memories

A few weeks later, the group had moved on to a new part of the kingdom. Not much had changed, really. Different forest, different town, but the Merry Men's camp was the same, tents arranged in a circle around a smoldering campfire, far enough into the woods that no one would come across them accidentally. With their leader and three of the men away, the camp was quiet for the moment. Regina stood abruptly, shouldering her bow and arrow with a determined glint in her eye.

"Regina, wait," said Little John, jumping to his feet and grabbing her arm. She turned sharply and shook off his grip.

"You can't stop me," she snarled. "They've been gone too long, we all know it. I'm going after them. Unless you're going to keep me here against my will?"

He blinked, startled, and shook his head.

"It's dangerous," he said. "Robin wouldn't want you to put yourself in danger."

"I can take care of myself," she retorted. "I'm not going to just sit here, not knowing what happened to him. I have to find him. Now get out of my way."

The men nearby stood back, letting her pass.

As she set out into the forest, she ran over their plan in her head. Just a quick trip lasting a day or two, he had said. Just a visit to the home of some minor nobles to relieve them of their riches, and then he would be back. You'll hardly notice I'm gone, he had said. Well, clearly that hadn't happened.

Wait.

Didn't this area look ... familiar?

She couldn't keep pretending she didn't know this place. There, up ahead as she emerged from the forest, was the pasture where Daniel had taught her to ride, and beyond that ...

No. This couldn't be.

Every instinct told her to turn and run. To get away from here as fast as she could. But he couldn't do that. Robin had come here, and if he hadn't come back ... well, she put that thought aside for the moment. No matter what had happened, she had to find out. She had to find him.

It took everything she had to put one foot in front of another and walk towards the house she had once called home. She couldn't let herself in through the front door, of course, so she punched the glass in one of the windows and cringed as the shattered pieces cut at her hand, drawing blood. Ignoring the pain, she climbed through and found herself in a familiar sitting room, empty except for the furniture.

She should have found a better way, she realized as her blood dripped on the carpet. Not only was it going to be hard to focus with her hand in pain, but she was going to leave a trail of blood through the house. Scowling, she ripped off a strip of fabric from the hem of her shirt and wrapped it around the wound as a makeshift bandage.

"Robin?" she called out softly, taking another step into the house. Now that she was here, she had no idea where to look for him.

"Regina."

The familiar voice sent a shiver down her spine. She looked around fearfully for its source.

"Mother?"

Cora stepped out from the doorway, as casually as if this was just an ordinary day and nothing had changed. Regina took a fearful step backwards.

"How did you – ?"

"Oh, a little rabbit brought me here," said Cora. "Did you really think sending me to another realm would keep me away?"

There was no sassy retort. To anyone else, yes, but with Cora, Regina froze up. All she could do was try not to show her fear. Her weakness.

"What are you doing here?" Regina asked, trying to keep her voice steady. "Where is Robin?"

"Oh, is that the thief's name?" Cora asked calmly. "I caught him and his companions trying to rob our home. Surely you didn't think I'd let him get away with it?"

Regina shuddered. In her memory, a body fell to the ground with a dull thud. The ashes of a heart slipped from her mother's fingers as she stared down into dead eyes.

"You killed him," she said, blinking back tears.

Cora laughed.

"How could you?" Regina demanded. "That's twice you've murdered the man I love. Why can't you just let me be happy?"

"Oh, he's not dead," said Cora. "Not yet, at least. Although I must say, you have horrible taste, my love. First a stable boy, now a common thief? What happened to the king?"

"I left him," said Regina defiantly.

Cora lifted her hand and Regina was floating in the air, struggling to free herself from the magic. Helpless, just like always.

"You foolish girl," Cora sneered. "You would leave wealth and power for the sake of 'True Love'?" she said the words with scorn. "You're even weaker than I thought. But never fear. You will be reunited with your love after all."

Regina couldn't help feeling a brief ray of hope. She knew in her head that whatever her mother had planned was certainly nothing good, but all the same ... maybe ...

Cora let her hand drop, and Regina collapsed to the floor. With another gesture, her ragged clothes were gone, replaced by a shimmering blue dress with a full skirt, not too different from the one she had worn when King Leopold proposed. She looked down at it in frustration.

"There," said Cora. "That's much better, don't you think?"

Regina said nothing. She didn't dare contradict her mother. She didn't dare tell her that she hated the innocent princess look her mother had always favored for her. That would only end in pain, as she knew from experience.

"Now, come with me," Cora said, and suddenly, an invisible force was pulling Regina to her feet. She followed after her mother obediently, still not bold enough to refuse. Cora led her down a hallway and toward a staircase that led to ...

"No."

The word was a whisper, more of a thought than anything else, but somehow she had spoken it aloud. Cora turned back and looked over her shoulder at her daughter, smiling slightly.

"Yes."

When her mother spoke, she had little choice but to obey. Her feet had carried her up these stairs before, and this time was no different. Cora came behind her, blocking off her exit, and she grew more and more panicked with each step. She hesitated in the doorway. Her mother gave her a pointed look, but she looked back in defiance. If Cora wanted her to obey, she would have to force her.

With a magical push, Regina found herself stumbling forward into her old bedroom. The door slammed shut behind her, and Regina collapsed to the floor just as the lock clicked into place.


	5. Forgotten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: reference to marital rape

Regina woke up in a soft feather bed. Propping herself up on her elbow, she looked around to see familiar walls closing in on her and familiar drapery overhead. She was even dressed in her usual cream-colored nightgown. Why did all of that seem so wrong? She had been … where had she been? No, she had never left. It must all have just been a dream. A good dream, but one that could never last.

She expected the servants to come in and dress her, but instead, she sat in bed, alone, staring at the walls, until her mind had almost gone numb from boredom. As awful as it was to be forced into a life she didn’t want, sitting here, isolated and neglected, was even worse.

Then, quietly, the door opened and a little dark-haired girl peeked in. Regina’s breath caught in her throat as she recognized her.

“Snow.”

All of a sudden, she was overwhelmed by anger. This girl was the reason for her pain. It was her fault Daniel had died, and she needed to suffer for it. For some reason she couldn’t explain, the hatred she felt was stronger now than it had ever been before. It was as if something within her had changed, but she couldn’t quite name it.

“So it’s true,” said Snow. “You really are back.”

“Back?” Regina fought to remain calm. “Snow, dear, I never left.”

Snow blinked in confusion. “But …”

“Now, Snow, run along, dear,” said a horrifyingly familiar voice from the hallway. Regina looked up from the young girl to the man who stood behind her, dressed in royal robes, with a crown on his balding head. King Leopold.

“I need to speak with your stepmother alone,” he said, and Snow obeyed, scurrying off down the corridor.

Leopold entered and closed the door behind him. For a moment, he just stood there, looking down at Regina as she sat in her bed, half-dressed and vulnerable. Her heart raced as horrible memories of her wedding night flooded her mind, as she remembered lying on her back and struggling not to cry while he …

“You have betrayed me, Regina,” he told her, pulling her back into the present. “Your mother tells me that you do not remember what you have done, and I have no plans to remind you.”

Regina stared at him. So it was true. She had lost her memories somehow.

“You should put it out of your mind and focus on being a better wife,” he added. “I will not stand for such betrayal again.”

Betrayal? The word made her bristle. A sudden urge came over her to rip his heart from his chest and crush it the way her mother had done to her poor Daniel. She held back, but how hard that was surprised her.

“You will spend the rest of the day confined to your room,” said Leopold. “We are hanging a thief tomorrow, and naturally, you will be expected to attend.”

As he turned to leave, she caught a glimpse of a guard in the hallway. Then the door slammed shut behind him, and she was left alone again.

* * *

 

After a long day of restless pacing, glaring at the walls, fighting back murderous impulses, and trying without success to remember whatever she had forgotten, Regina drifted off into a troubled sleep filled with nightmares of her mother’s face and dreams of running through the forest, completely free, with someone at her side, someone whose face was out of focus, whose identity she could never quite make out.

She woke and stared at her hands, which were no longer soft and perfectly-manicured. Instead, she had callouses on her palms and broken fingernails like a peasant girl.

She rolled back over, hoping for a few more minutes of sleep before the servants came, but her mind refused to relax. Something was wrong here. From the way her hidden anger had grown seemingly overnight into a desire to burn this castle to the ground, to the memories the king admitted had been stolen from her, to the callouses on her hands, to the feeling of something missing, which had always been there but was so much stronger than usual, there was no denying that something had changed in the time she had forgotten.

But she didn’t get a chance to consider what that might be. The servants were here to dress her in layers of velvet, tight corsets, jewelry that felt like heavy golden chains and a crown that she had never wanted. As they led her to the courtyard, where a crowd was already gathering for the hanging, she wondered if she might feel just a fraction of what the condemned man was feeling. They were both prisoners here in very different ways.

As they led him to the gallows, the thief’s eyes searched the crowd desperately before settling on Regina. A chill ran down her spine as she met his eyes, and even though she couldn’t explain it, her feeling of something not being right only grew. Then he was struggling against the guards, screaming out her name.

“REGINA!”

And before anyone knew what had happened, he had gotten ahold of one of the guards’ swords and cut himself free of his bonds. They grabbed him again in an instant, but he just kept on screaming Regina’s name, sobbing, kicking and struggling as they tried to contain him. And there was definitely something wrong here.

Regina barely knew what she was doing when the guards froze in place. The crowd did too, held back by magic as she approached the condemned thief, who stared at her in shock and … well, something else she was afraid to name.

“What is this?” Leopold demanded. “I order you to stop, Regina.”

She turned and looked at him over her shoulder. “And why should I?”

“You are my wife. You must obey me.”

“I was never your wife!” Regina spat. “I was your possession. And I won’t be that anymore.”

She pushed as hard as she could with a magic she barely knew how to control, and he went flying backwards. His crown rolled to the ground as he fell limply against the wall. Regina walked toward him in a murderous rage, but a voice behind her stopped her.

“Regina.”

She turned and looked back at the blue-eyed thief, her anger tempered by her curiosity.

“Who are you?” she asked.

“My name is Robin,” he said. “Robin of Locksley. We’ve met before, but I know you don’t remember.”

Oh. She might have guessed as much, but it was different hearing it out loud. He took another step closer, and so did she.

“I’m afraid I can’t restore your memories,” he said. “I love you, but you’ve forgotten me now. And a True Love’s Kiss most likely wouldn’t work anyway, because your True Love is …”

“Dead,” Regina finished. “I told you about him?”

Robin nodded. He kept walking towards her, and soon they were close enough to touch. Regina’s gaze softened as she looked into his eyes.

“We weren’t together,” said Robin. “You weren’t ready to move on yet, because of the love you lost. But Regina, I promise you, we did love each other, and I hope … I hope that we can make new memories together.”

Regina felt a tear roll down her cheek, but she was smiling. With a hesitant nod, she leaned forward to kiss him, thinking this would never work, because he wasn’t Daniel and she couldn’t even remember their time together. But the only things that mattered were their lips moving together and his hands in her hair, and she leaned forward to deepen the kiss, and …

The pulse of light came as a shock. She pulled away as the memories came rushing back to her, and tears filled her eyes.

“Robin …”

She looked down at her hands, as if she still held his heart in one and a bottle of memory potion in the other, as if Cora was still there, telling her to choose, saying that she could remember him or save his life, but not both.

“If you don’t choose, then I’ll crush his heart myself and make you drink that potion,” Cora had said. So she had whispered a tearful goodbye and brought the bottle to her lips.

“I don’t understand …” Robin’s words broke the silence.

Regina smiled. She would always love Daniel, but maybe it was possible to find love again.

“We need to get out of here,” she said. “I’ve never … well, I’ve only used magic once before. I don’t know how long this spell will hold, and they’ll come after us.”

* * *

 

Late that night, as they lay on the floor of his tent, wrapped up in each other’s arms, bare skin against bare skin, he whispered in her ear:

“So tell me again. What would it be like if you loved me?”

Regina just smiled. “I don’t have to imagine ‘if’. I do love you.”

And with that, she kissed him again, and words became completely unnecessary.


End file.
